The CotoBuzz Journal, Community Journalism

The CotoBuzz Journal

Community Journalism, Newsletters and Blogs Covering South Orange County, CA

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March 2007 Issue

We do not make jokes, we simply watch the LA Times, the Orange County Register and the Coto de Caza Board of directors and report the facts!

Coto de Caza's Equus trailus patrolus publicus (horse trail patrols paid by the commonwealth)

Gendarmerie Royale Du Coto de Caza

February 24, 2007

We were befuddled by the recent announcement by the CZ Master Association board of directors of the impending deployment of mounted units of the Sheriff’s department to patrol the horse trails and fire roads that surround the community. After all, all the available public safety data from the Justice Department in Sacramento, to the CHP in San Juan Capistrano, of the Orange County Sheriff’s department, all indicate major public safety problems are elsewhere in the community.

That is, until Coto de Caza resident Brian Walsh put it in perspective for us in his Letter to the Editor published in the CanyonLife February 23, 2007. Walsh asks rhetorically “ We’ve all seen the triangular sign that indicates that bicyclists and hikers should yield to horses, but are there any real rules and why are many of the horse riders so arrogant? How far before them should I get on my knees and bow until they have gone? …..Am I expected to hang subserviently back and interrupt my run…?”. He then concludes “My wife has even been accused of probably not being from Coto, by an arrogant rider. Just because the horse and rider are at the top of the trail triangle does not make them superior beings” – However, in the CZ Master Association’s economy, under the Varo/Mezger administration, Walsh is clearly wrong. The Gendarmerie Royale Du Coto de Caza, composed of mounted units of the Sheriff's department, are being deployed not to protect the commoners, but to protect the Coto de Caza nobility aka LOPR (List of Prominent Coto Residents).

According to the collaborative online encyclopedia Wekipedia, an Equestrian was a member of one of the two upper social classes in the Roman Republic and early Roman Empire, where equestrians were the nearest Roman equivalent to Medieval nobility, the Roman tax farming system shared many similarities with medieval feudalism.

Originally, the Equestrians were a military as well as a political group. It is said that king Servius Tullius divided the Roman nation into centuries, which were not only units of soldiers on the battlefield but also voting units in the so-called Centuriate Assembly. Consequently, it was prestigious to own and ride a horse: you could show that you were rich and did not have to perform manual labor (or hand to hand combat). Ancient Rome was no exception to this rule, although the horsemen received financial compensation to buy a horse (the equus publicus, horse bought by the commonwealth).

Now consider that the CZ Master commonwealth has experienced two consecutively monthly dues increases in the last two years “in order to bring services to standard” – but the common areas, (wit Coto de Camel Drive now looks heinous using "rocks native to the area", instead of the designated bucolic look), and public safety has deteriorated (the first and second fatal traffic accident in the history of the community, for instance), one would wonder where the money is going. Also consider that CZ Master Association elections are scheduled to take place in April 2007, you have your answer: The money is going to (in our opinion, useless) Equus trailus patrolus publicus (horse trail patrols paid by the commonwealth) for the Coto de Caza nobility to support the Varo/Mezger CZ Empire. Finally, what about all the equus excrement in the various crossing streets in the community you ask? No problem, as a highly-paid CZ Master Association landscaping consultant might say, that type of excrement is native to the Varo/Mezger administration and the current safety committee!